Monday, January 12, 2009

Where Are They Hidin' Biden?

As we are now one week out from the inauguration I thought I'd take a break from chronicling ironies and do something suitable for that event instead. We haven't written any songs lately, and I'd been mentioning to D that we really were overdue. We bounced around a few ideas that fizzled. (We weren't sure that titling an oratorio The Obamessiah wasn't outright blasphemy and decided we'd better not chance it. Besides, we suspect that Handel is above our pay grade.) Over the weekend, the muse struck (I think she nailed me with a dobro) and I came up with the ditty below.

Even before Election day, the VP-elect seemed an afterthought. Some supporters of the president-elect were a bit fuzzy about who exactly occupied that second slot. My conspiracy theorist side wondered privately about the psychological implications of those DNC campaign signs--the dark blue ones with "Obama" in glaring white and "Biden" fading away in a lighter shade of blue. I was extremely amused one day when I passed one in which (not sure if it was a trick of the light or an especially dark print run) the VP's name was barely visible at other than ten feet dead ahead.

Since the election, the old boy seems to have dropped off the face of the earth. I noticed a news story recently mentioning his return from Afghanistan (so that's where they stashed him!) but other than that he's of remarkably little interest to anybody who anchors TV news, buys ink by the barrel, worked on his campaign, voted for him... I have to wonder if they remember who he is...


Sung to the tune of Lynyrd Skynyrd's What's Your Name?, with apologies to Gary Rossington and the memory of Ronnie Van Zant.

Well, it's 'Nauguration Day, Washington, D.C.
Six thousand folks in town
For every Port-A-Potty*-- oooh whee!
Barack Obama's sworn in and he's standin' tall--
But who's the old guy with him?
I can't remember him at all.

What's his name? The VP--
What's his name?
Can't keep him straight--in my mind;
Still, it's nice he came.

Back at the hotel
Ballroom, they got such strife:
It seems the Veep showed up to
Celebrate and dance with the wife-- (all night!)
Well, the police said he'd need ID or he'd have to go--
I guess the Big Night Out's a
Krispy Kreme and cup of Joe.

What's his name? The VP--
What's his name?
Came from which state?--I dunno--
Well, it's all the same...

Nine o' clock the next day
He's under the Dome
'Til the Pro Tem comes from the Chamber
To send him off home-- (don'tcha roam!)
Off he goes to the White House instead:
"Barack! He needs my help!"
And from inside the Oval Office
Comes the frantic yelp:

"What was his name? My VP--
What's his name?
Shootin' you straight--can't recall--
Tell me who's to blame?
What's his name? My VP--
What's his name?
Nobody seems to know--
But it's nice he came."

*See DUmmiefunnies for statistics.

Earlier parodies here.

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