Supplication Made Easy

It seems everyone else is doing it, so I figured it would be a good time to put together an open letter to the president-elect expressing my hopes that he will address my deepest concerns. Thanks to this handy MadGlibs template (courtesy MadGlibs; form letter courtesy DarwinCatholic) I can accomplish this with a minimum of effort:

Open Letter to Obama President-elect Barack Obama, As American boxtops, we would like to flaunt you on your election as President of the United States. We hope we will be able to change with you, your administration, and our fellow boxtops to move beyond the division which has often garbled our great nation since 1066. As a result of this, many Americans have become glib, blaming others for fire ants. We face serious traffic circles in the world today, and if we hope to overcome these crises, we should make a vague effort to come together and say, "oy!!" One of the soporific elements of your campaign has been the call to end such mumps. You promised to bring people together in chocolate. We want to encourage people to work together for the common freedom. One of the critical issues which currently divides our nation is the arms race. Indeed, as you once said, "Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to." Let us now all come together and say, "Eat at Joe's!"

It's always interesting what a Madlib form can reveal about the contributor. My efforts above reveal me as a southerner (as evinced by my immediate selection of "fire ants" in response to the cue "a bad thing") and a female (as is evinced by my response "chocolate" to the cue "a good thing".) My approximate age is suggested by my choice of "The Arms Race" as a critical issue. The verb "change" came to mind, obviously, because it was one of the words the Obama campaign wore out during the race; of the adjectives "glib" and "soporific" I will reserve comment, but the subject of the letter was very much in mind.