Saturday, July 04, 2009

Low-Fidelity Recordings

I'm seriously considering launching a "Cast-Iron Skillet Award" (preferably between the eyes) for politicos who get busted cheatin' on their spouses and act like it's business as usual. My own model (photo included) will have to do for this though it has taken a bit of rust (especially after I cooked tomatoes in it). It is, however, in fine fighting fettle (and doesn't need to be pretty) should any aggrieved spouses wish to borrow it for the purpose of driving a point home for the cads who done them wrong. Mrs. Mark Sanford appears to be handling her wandering husband's recent divulgences with class and spine not often seen in wronged political wives; I'm not too far a drive and can drop it off on the way to the zoo sometime if she'd like. In any case, I hope she maintains the firm spine. Somebody's got to, and based on the events of the last two weeks I'm not holding out much hope for him.

In the meantime, I'll just submit the following playlists (thanks to DMinor for his assistance remembering some of the songs) for edification and/or inspiration of the two parties most intimately concerned in the Sanford Infidelity Sideshow. A couple of the songs will also do for the third most intimately concerned party (as noted.) I won't attempt a separate playlist for the femme fatale of the piece. All I can think of off the top of my head is Teardrops on My Guitar (Swift) and that doesn't seem to fit anyway.

Playlist for Gov. Mark Sanford:

Your Cheatin' Heart (Williams, Sr.)
Travelin' Man (Nelson)
The Thrill is Gone (King)
Torn Between Two Lovers (McGregor) [POV shift required]
I'm in Love With the Other Woman (Parker, Jr.)
Me and Mrs. Jones (Paul)
Savin' All My Love For You (Houston) [POV shift reqd, In original form, also useful for the mistress's playlist. Or he can assume it is.]
Take a Letter, Maria(Stone) [Actually about the situaton in reverse. But the name fits, and the sonofagun's demonstrated considerable skill at self-delusion.]
It Wasn't Me (Shaggy)
Breaking Up is Hard To Do (Sedaka)
Making Love (Out of Nothing at All)(Air Supply/Steinman--who else?) [Suitable for attempts to "fall back in love" with one's wife. Which inevitably brings us to...]
Two Out of Three Ain't Bad (Meat Loaf/Steinman)

Playlist for Jennifer Sanford:

Lyin' Eyes (Eagles) [Again, some POV shift required]
Take It on the Run (REO Speedwagon) [POV shift req.]
You Oughtta Know (Morissette)
I Will Survive (Gainor)
Before He Cheats (Underwood) [Strictly for the catharsis, of course]
Take a Bow (Rhianna) [Should Mrs. S conclude that she's really had enough.]
Irreplaceable (Beyonce) [Might also work for the mistress's playlist, should she decide Sanford's more trouble than he's worth.]

Labels: ,


Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home