The Foley of Men

Current events in Congress have recently drawn the attention of the Minor Premise parody department . . . .

TEXT THE PAGE
Apologies to Bob Segar
(DMinor and CMinor)
On a long and lonesome hallway, Washington DC
You listen to the speeches just as dull as they can be
You think of reelection
and your recess back in F L A

But your thoughts will soon be wandering the way they always do
When you're waiting for a quorum, there's nothing much to do
And you don't feel much like voting
You just wish the session through

Here I am, on IM again
I am told, it's all the rage
On email, I'm a stud again
Who will know, text the page

So you walk into this press conference rattled by the polls
And you feel the eyes upon you and their looks are rather cold
You pretend it doesn't bother you
Tho' heads are gonna roll

You claim it was idle talk, an October surprise
But sending smut to teenage boys, was it really wise?
And now the press and Democrats, are circling you like flies
Alibis?

There I was, on IM again
Naughty text, caused all the rage
Could have just, hit the bar again
But instead, text the page

Now I'm in the spotlight, Hastert struggles just to stay
The Democrats are certain that they'll take the House away
ABC reports the rumors
That I'm drunk and that I'm gay

Later on in rehab, my career is dead
Investigators read hard drives to find out what I said
And all the pages' mommas are calling for my head
Should have fled

Here I am, out on my ear again
Wish I had, acted my age
Can't go near, another child again
Because of, that darn page
Now they know, about the page
Now they know
Here I go